It's been a while!!!

So where has the summer gone or should I ask did it ever arrive? Overall the weather was poor with cool temperatures and a lot of grey skies; what a great month to take off eh?!?!? Nevertheless it didn't stop me getting the garden sorted but it did stop me getting a lovely sun tan.

The vegetables overall this summer have had a varied success - good lettuces and beans (quite bored of beans by September) but not great courgettes. Beetroots were a half and half crop - some were whoppers and and some were no bigger than a marble. Same with carrots - some horse carrots and some tiddlers. Overall though nothing has shown great growth and anything planted later in the season for a autumn crop has been a waste of time. My spring onions are no more than sprigs of grass and it is now time to put my over-wintering variety into the ground. I've left the carrots in but seeing as they haven't grown any bigger than a few inches I'm not getting excited.

Over the summer I have also been doing wedding stuff, which still fails to get me overly excited (the planning not the wedding)- it is just another thing to do although I must say it feels like a busman's holiday in a funny. No really it is a shame we couldn't do it earlier in the year as to be honest a whole year of planning is too long really; sod's law thatI quit RREF otherwise we could have had a nice September autumnal wedding. Only ten weeks to go anyway so not long; I'm in two minds about the day - nervous as hell and anxious about being in front of everyone but excited about the overall 'marriage' and really looking forward to the reception i.e. chance to relax! It will be lovely to see all the people who matter to us there; sad that our dads can't be there. I suppose I just can't imagine what on earth a wedding day feels like; it must be a whirl of nerves, excitement, fun, laughter and lots of people. I'm glad we only have a smallish number as I do wonder how one could speak to more than about 60 in a day. I'm slowly crossing things off my list; I think we are reasonably on track.

Other main thing in my life is job-hunting which is about as fun as plucking nose hairs!!! Not having a job is far from ideal especially with wedding coming up and more so the honeymoon. I have registered with agencies in town and online but am now starting to read books on career change. "What Color is My Parachute" is one and "Do What You Are" is the other; its all very well saying do what you are but after completing the MBTI questionning I can't even work out who I am!!!! The parachute book is quite interesting and takes a different approach but we'll see what happens...education is still there in my mind particularly adult education e.g. literacy, numeracy, etc.

Fantastic Flowers

I must say and I am being completely bias but honest, that the garden looks fabulous on the whole - the herbaceous border is amazing, the annuals and rose garden is really coming into its own and the vegetable patch is blooming. A surprise for this year was the creation of a wonderful rockery but the manly beloved - he moved a whole load of concrete from the old path and earth and a few old tree stumps to make a stunning structure, which is really coming into its own.

There is still work to be done nearer the house - aquilegia-tastic but I will be weedkilling today. I KNOW it is better to dig it out, more organic etc but they are a total nuisance and must die!! The herbaceous border is GORGEOUS; so many plants kindly donated by my mother last year have really come into their own. I can really see that as the plants become more established they flourish and really do bloom more and look stronger. The success flower in the Spring has to be the lupin - three lowly plants put in last year have created towering spikes of candy floss that are still blooming now in July. I keep cutting the old spikes down to the nearest leaf and another albeit slightly smaller one pops up in its place.

Other successes this year are the Cirsium - I think the tallest was about five foot and all May the bumble bees (of which there have been masses) have been snuffling right into the densely packed petals getting their fix of honey for the day.

Plants that are really coming into their best now include the Monarda, which only seems to grown well in my garden; I keep giving my mother and sister cuttings but they don't seem to take, which is frustrating as it is a lovely flower. The pink Gypsophila is taking off and I love the scent it gives off plus the fact it is a great flower for cutting. It sits quite happily next to the Lavender and Mexican Daisy with yellow Sage and dwarf Amaranthus poking through at intervals. It has been a good year for Heucharas - my Mocha has grown to be vast and I'll probably chop a bit off for mum later in the year. Dead nettles are still proving to be lovely ground cover that stretches over the patch to make the whole area look a little more established.
Roses I must say have not been that great in my opinion; we discussed this yesterday and think we will give them a really good feed at the end of the season and lots of farmyard manure. Annuals are filling up the spaces where we have no roses and I'm very pleased with myself and my annual trials. I have had immense success with Briza grasses, aforementioned Dwarf Amaranthus, Cerinthe or 'Honeywort', Black Boy Cornflowers, the most amazing Black Peony Poppies, the Cosmos purity and Zinnia envy are on their way as are the Scabious, Agrostis, Anethum or 'Dill' and the simple but very pretty Oriental nights Allysum. I will definitely grow annuals again next year as they are so easy and are out of the greenhouse before the toms, etc need the space.

Holidays Galore

So when we decided to book a honeymoon we procrastinated for days and virtually traveled the globe in search of somewhere suitable at what could possibly be the worst time of year for honeymoons - December, Christmas and New Year!! Jolly good planning there especially as we delayed the wedding to December because of my work....which is now no longer (hoorah) - sod and his law!!

We were going to do Tanzania (too expensive), then it was going to be Thailand backpacking (too many 'orible backpackers spaced out on ecstasy), then Goa/Kerala (underlying concern that we didn't want to have to do poverty on our honeymoon - harsh but true), almost became Kenya (although desparate for our business the massive hotels there abused tourists enthusiasm for returning by adding on Christmas supplements just for being there and then New Year supplements just for being there and we're not talking a couple of quid - £700 per hotel!!!!) until we finally plumped for Stan's first choice of South Africa.

Very excited as we're seeing a lot but also not rushing too much, only thing I'm a little sad about is missing out on a luxury beach moment but I think what we're going to do is fabulous. Lowveld, Kruger, Cape Town and the Cape Winelands - heavenly. We're self-driving most of it except in the Kruger and I have managed to pick a honeymoon where we fly a total of six times...as you all know I DON'T DO FLYING!!!!! gulp

At the weekend a friend said casually to me "I expect you won't be going on any other holidays with that big one planned?"...how little do people know of us! We couldn't possibly be content with no holidays until December - outrageous. We're off to Switzerland for two weeks in September - posh camping!!! The not so mighty EURO looked decidedly poor value for a trip to euroland so we went for the neutral party in Europe - the gorgeous Switzerland. We're staying at a campsite that I visited with my brother and parents a LONG time ago and I'm sure it is going to be every bit as beautiful as it was back then.

Dotted throughout the summer we'll be weekending on the beloved's boat as we did last weekend - it was glorious weather so we did any overnighter on the Thames, which was great fun. We moored up in (yes IN not to) a tree at Cliveden and enjoyed a lovely evening's walk up to the house itself for some stunning views over Berkshire. Supper was book reading with chorizo and crispie canapes plus a glass of Lidl's best red with the sun setting over the river. Yes it really was that romantic!! I think the beloved fiance was pleasantly surprised at my ability to be Second Mate and keep everything sorted at locks, etc, given that he also thinks I'm a little adverse to giving things a go. It was a great trip and we really did work well together - hardly a cross word and lots and lots of laughs. I think taking a 70+ year old wooden boat out together on the Thames is a great way to see if couples can work well together!

Shall we move??

Yes it has been a seriously long time since I have written anything on my blog, predominantly because I haven't felt like it as work has been one the gruesome side but now I'm out the other end with the great unknown in front of me I feel a whole lot better.

In the time that I have been away from my blog a whole lot of things have been happening both in the garden and with me. The beloved and I decided to move house to Wiltshire and then decided to move to the Test Valley and then decided to stay in Reading although we have confirmed we would ultimately like to live in that area around the river Test whether it be slightly North of Andover or slightly West or South, its that area. We actually did go and look at some houses and got our pad valued and ready for sale but his work played a part in knocking some sense into us and making us realise that we like our creature comforts so will only move when we're financially happy with it. Perhaps the reaction was to my strife at work and a way of escaping it all but once I gave my notice in, the panic subsided and the worse case scenario of temping/looking for a new wasn't that bad after all. Reading is okay; just not what we like in an area especially when your dodgy window cleaner attempts to break in through the cat flap and the car gets keyed just 'for the fun of it' but hey it can happan anywhere!!

The short term plan means we remain in Reading - we really have to now as the prices are falling a little although not as much as in some places as Reading is always a relatively hot spot of property given its economy and proximity to London. Medium term i.e. 2-5 years would see us moving out and into our 'family home' if we have a family that is but we would definitely have a dog or two by then so they would need the space!! Five years plus sees us staying in aforementioned family home and living with roses round the door, apple trees in the garden, sun beaming into the kitchen with the smell of something delicious cooking in the aga and gin and tonics at six o'clock sitting in the summer house enjoying the lovely weather. Ahem....reality hits as I awake from my lovely dream :)

Chicken-sitting

Our first stint at looking after some little ones for a long period of time is coming to an end; Goldie, Ginger and Dopey's parents return tomorrow and take over the everyday care of these fluffy little people.

Okay so they're chickens. I know, I know but they act like little people and also, from the little I know from experiences with my niece and nephew, they act like children! Trying to cajole them into their cage could be equated to getting children into bed when they want to stay up that little bit longer. WHY won't the blasted things just get into the cage? Why? Because they want to continue mooching around the garden and in fact why should they when it clearly far more fun tormenting me by hiding round the side of the chicken coop!! Grrrr

However, like children there are far more fun moments than frustrating ones. There is nothing more amusing than watching them scratch around in the raised beds - I hope that our neighbours haven't planted any seeds yet!! In fact I think they may have given up with seeds and growing most things in the greenhouse first - very sensible as otherwise it would be a continuing cycle of a) sow seed, b) wait patiently for it to germinate and c) feel desire to wring chicken's neck as you realise they have happily scratched up said seed all in the name of FUN! They are very sociable creatures as well - as soon as I appear in the garden they can hear my footsteps and run over to great me. They do however rapidly disappear when they realise I have no food for them! I have discovered that they have a particular fondness for Evening Primrose - luckily I wanted to remove it from the garden I suppose as they clearly thought this when they manage to devour most of it through the garden fence! Things had to STOP when they took a liking to my Penstomen!!

So after a week we have got plenty of free range eggs, some of which I tried yesterday and must say I was a little dissapointed. I grew up with chickens at the bottom of the garden and the eggs we had were the most delicious I have ever tasted. I think this is due to the boiled up vegetable scraps (regularly burnt on the aga by Dad - I remember the smell to this day) and mash they ate and the wide area of land they had to forage in - probably an acre for six or seven hens. The only risk they ever were subjected to was the rifle range in which they foraged - as far as I know no chicken was ever mistaken for a target or were they...?

The Heatwave has ended!

Not so great for me as I'm home at the moment but probably much better for my plants. The greenhouse was turning into a desert-like environment with leaves beginning to scorch in the sun. I must get some of that shade paint but haven't been able to find any as yet. I planted out four varieties of tomatoes in the greenhouse: San Marzano, Costoluto Fiorentino, Vanessa F1 and Beam's Yellow Pear plus two aubergines. I have since found out that the BYP is likely to take over my greenhouse (grows to 6' plus) and the rest are fairly sturdy growing cordons. Joy! I'm also going to try growing them all outside as well but in a grow bag as i don't want to infect them with last year's blight which may be in the ground just waiting to take out my toms!! The one remaining Gartenperle (the other died a very hot death in the GH) is now in a basket with trailing nasturtiums and Alyssum 'oriental nights'; this is a potential colour clash from hell but personally I love purple and orange together with a bit of red thrown in for good measure!

I have also built a fantastic squash and trailing courgette frame out of the ash branches from mum's garden; it does look pretty darn good even if I do say so myself. I'm really enjoying making structures out of natural materials as they look so much nicer than a stack load of bamboo shoots. It must be a more ecologically sound way to garden as opposed to buying bamboo from goodness knows where. However, I have had to use some bamboo for my first lot of climbing beans so I'm not a total tree hugger just yet....

The climbing beans have been an interesting experiment; I indvertently became a separate experiment all on my own when in a clear moment of delirium I decided my climbers were getting too leggy so I pinched them out ??!?!?!?!? I know, I know, it was a slightly alternative decision and one I thought I may regret but low and behold the little plants have decided to make a full come back and have grown new climbing shoots, in one plant there are two climbing shoots. I knew it would work and I'm bound to have stronger, tougher bean plants as a result. Hah!

Moving onto the other beans that are in my garden - broadies. They are now under attack from black fly. I'm slightly peeved as the summer savory I bought to ward off the blighters hasn't grown so now they are all quite happily sucking the sweet gooey stuff out of the beans and are closely followed behind by the ants who are harvesting them for the resulting sweet gooey stuff in the flies. War has been announced and I'm going to make up a washing-up liquid solution to blast them to kingdom come. I also may remove the tips and hopefully the beans will grow side shoots as they are only 18" tall at the mo - somewhat annoying but I do seem to grow black fly particularly well.

One thing I am particularly pleased about is that I have identifed my odd looking plants in pots; I thought they may have been the elusive cleomes but unfortunately not and after much hunting around they are in fact Nicandra Physaloides or the 'Shoo Fly Plant'. This is a good thing as they can be a good companion plant especially attractive to white fly which do love the kale I grow. I did read though that they are part of the Nightshade family so rather poisonous if ingested. must remember not to eat them in a moment of hunger induced madness!

There is so much now in the GH waiting to go out; I'm tempted to plant the squashes but thought the the little rain we had today will have washed some of the chicken poo into the ground so I don't plant direct into the smelly stuff. I'm going to fill some of the buckets we have lying around with compost and try growing some pea tips, some chantenay carrots, spring onions and possibly some more salad leaves. The salad leaves so far have been abismal and are quire weedy looking - so much so that I'm tempted to pull them up and use their space for something else. I also need to plant out some kohl rabi as I would like to give that a go. I do seem to have quite a lot of climbing veg this year, no bad thing but I would like to have a few lovely rows of some things. In fact I think I will prepare another gutter of beetroot as that worked quite well, unlike the carrots although I'm always game for another go..

Looking around the veggie patch everything else is ticking along nicely - the potatoes have now decided they want to grow and in particular the early Charlotte are steaming ahead nicely. Yum! It was sod's law that as soon as we paid £20 for three potato sacks and potatoes we started to see similar in all the garden centres for about half the price. Ho hum. I keep comforting myself with the knowledge that mine have velcro flaps from which I can open them up and gather the lovely potatoes; i am completely ignoring the fact that the compost is bound to all come rushing out so what's the point but STILL, they look lovely and are very gadgety!

And finally....I must be the owner of the slowest, less likely to take over, can't be bothered Jersalem Artichokes. TWO MONTHS after planting the red tubers into the rockery did they decide to bring free of the soil.. I was giving up and planning to fill that space with something different but at last the potential ten footers have arrived and now going great guns.

Successful Day

Today I have a list as long as my arm and I'm going to attempt to photograph as I go; after all who wants to read about me and my life when it is far more interesting to see.

Glorious morning so far and I have achieved a huge amount already this morning. I have come to the conclusion that guerilla style cleaning is the way to go - managed to do the house top to bottom in an hour and feel spectacularly smug about it too. Job done! I am pondering on what we have left in the garden that should really be coming out and it is mainly the leeks, spinach and kale. The leeks will come out today and get eaten alongside a roast chicken courtesy of The Black Farmer...hope it is worth the £7 I paid for it. I had spinach today for breakfast with an egg and fish but the stuff still keeps growing albeit the plants are desparate to bolt, I just keep stopping them. The kale is approximately four feet tall now and really ready to go but there are still leaves and they are still delicious. The sprouting stalks are being subjected to an onslaught of white fly so they really should go but I can't bring myself to do it.....

Later that day....
A most successful day today as I got a whole load of both veggie and non-veggie things done:
Dug up remaining leeks
Hoed the veggie patch
Potted up the peppers and added more soil to the aubergines
Potted up my Yellow Beam toms
Moved the Hebes
Moved the Felton Buddleia
Planted the ferns
Planted out the five for a pound perennials: Geum, Lobelia, Mallow, Achillea and Coreopsis
Thinned out the stachys, dead nettle and sedum
Weeded the cottage garden

Am very pleased with myself.

Now off for a Chinese in preperation of more hard work tomorrow.

Lots to do!

Today I have a list as long as my arm and I'm going to attempt to photograph as I go; after all who wants to read about me and my life when it is far more interesting to see.



Glorious morning so far and I have achieved a huge amount already this morning. I have come to the conclusion that guerilla style cleaning is the way to go - managed to do the house top to bottom in an hour and feel spectacularly smug about it too. Job done! I am pondering on what we have left in the garden that should really be coming out and it is mainly the leeks, spinach and kale. The leeks will come out today and get eaten alongside a roast chicken courtesy of The Black Farmer...hope it is worth the £7 I paid for it. I had spinach today for breakfast with an egg and fish but the stuff still keeps growing albeit the plants are desparate to bolt, I just keep stopping them. The kale is approximately four feet tall now and really ready to go but there are still leaves and they are still delicious. The sprouting stalks are being subjected to an onslaught of white fly so they really should go but I can't bring myself to do it.....

My Gosh it's May!

So its the 1st of May, the heating should be off and hopefully the sun should shine more and boost everybody into the lovely summery feeling. Instead it's still really rather chilly, the heating is on and even the nice and last night the toasty fire was filling the living room with a glow of fluffiness and warmth. But "ah ha!", THAT was April so in theory today should be a lovely warm day during which I can whip out my flip flops and embrace that summery feeling. Hmmmm...

The past few days have been a mixture of wedding and plants; wedding at the weekend and gardening in between. At the weekend the beloved and I went to our menu tasting for the Big Day - completely forgot that we would have to try vino plonko, reception drinks and bubbly as well so muggins here volunteered to be the driver. It was lovely being back at the venue; for some reason it reminds me of my childhood home - doesn't really look like it although they were both big and Georgian!

Our venue is very Pride & Prejudice mixed with a dose of Brideshead Revisited. At any moment I expect Mr Darcy (preferably the Colin Firth variety) to come out of the lake (okay a large pond) dripping in water and looking devastatingly handsome. The gorgeous Beloved posed beside it on saturday, not necessarily the same idea but looking good all the same.

The tasting was a great success although in the classic Sweet Pea way I'm now not sure about the started although it was delicious - can a menu be too meaty? Promise no meat in the pud though! We met with the Wedding Co-Ordinator afterwards, Melissa, who is great and super efficient. I do believe that this venue really epitomises the concept of 'you get what you pay for' as the service so far has been fantastic. We must have spent an hour with Melissa doing the initial run through - alot of TBCs at the moment but we have to have those finalised by October. It felt a bit daft saying "I don't know" and "we're not sure" to so many things - do people have all these answers this far in advance? Surely not!! Doing things like this really brings the whole thing back to us and how exciting it is - I find it so easy to forget that it is creeping up on us quite quickly. Eek.

Going to the venue has refired my enthusiasm....well blown a little air on it...and I'm determined to get the florist booked (still can't decide and haven't really been bothered so must do), honeymoon sorted and other big things like transport, BM dress and list of things for the Best Man to take responsibility for....

The Great Outdoors

So the experimental beans have made their journey to the Great Outdoors and are now planted in lovely Reading soil along with some chicken manure pellets. Goodness knows what will happen to them but as I suggested to the brother in charge of the experiment, they will either crop as if they are on steroids or die! So far so good after one night on their own although my dwarf beans (master piece) which also went out last night look decidedly peeved at being outside as opposed to my nice warm downstairs loo. Perhaps they are missing the smell of lavender air freshener?

The trial gutter beetroots also went out last night; whoever claimed it was an easy way to transplant seedlings into the ground was fibbing. The seedlings didn't seem to want to line up in the orderly fashion in which they have been growing in the gutters and instead decided to play hardball and refuse to vacate their cosy home or just aim for a different patch of ground. very frustrating so I ended up forcing the little blighters into the space I had put aside and wondered why on earth did I ever entertain the idea of gutters????

Everything in the greenhouse seems to be okay although I have the feeling they are craving warmer nights; no frosts here but still a bit nippy and I don't think my seedlings are that amused. My annuals, on the other hand, do seem to be thriving although unsurprisingly the elusive cleomes are adhering to their famous inability to germinate on demand and done sweet F A. Everything else looks like it may make it and this just leaves me with the decision on where in the garden are these little seeding-freely blighters going to go!

Brides and Beans

So it seems that younger brother and me have ongoing blogs about beans; obviously his doesn't hold the excitement of weddings on the side! Older brother has asked to incorporate his growing experiences but has been rejected on the grounds of not having the seeds to grow in the first place! I don't see any reason for him to submit plant photos and updates onto my blog as growing tomatoes in Japan could be considered interesting to some.

The beans are doing brilliantly; in fact everything is doing brilliantly now they are happy in their new greenhouse. The greenhouse took the beloved and I approximately eight to ten hours to build over four days but we did it without smashing a single pain of completely and utterly untoughened glass. I was chief in charge of rubber strips (ooer) and he was chief glass pane installer - it worked well and I feel very chuffed with myself given that I'm admittedly not that DIY inclined. It now sits on our lower deck in a lovely south-west facing spot and still allows us to be able to sit on the deck enjoying our sundowners (never had one but sounded good in this context) as the sun drops below the caretakers house at the bottom of the garden!

So all the seedlings both flowers and vegetables are doing well; so far the following veggies are in there, waiting to be planted out:

Both sets of trial climbing french beans

Spaghetti squash

Pink banana pumpkin

Plum tomato (san marzano)

Beef tomatoe (costoluto fiorentino)
Dangling cherry tomato (gartenperle)

Aubergine (moneymaker)

Sweet pepper (golden bell)

Kale (red bor)

A random brussels sprout (I think noisette but can't be sure until it grows to full size

Beetroot in guttering (chioggia)

Chilli peppers (Chayenne, Apache and something else)

Flowers doing their stuff include:

Zinnia (green envy)

Cosmos (purity)

Scabiosa (dwf QIS mix)

Centaurea (black boy and frosty mix)

Amaranthus (dwf pygmy something)

Ammi major (queen of africa)

Marigold (crackerjack)

Briza maxima

Nigella hispanica (struggling to survive at the moment)

Lots more to come but I wanted to see how the first batch faired especially the toms and other 'hot climate' veggies/fruit (depending on which camp you sit) although given the lovely sunshine we're currently having, I think they will thrive. Fingers crossed for that elusive successful tomato year! Waiting in the wings are my courgettes (tromboncinos) and cucumber (marketmore) plus some yellow beam pear cherry tomatoes and some corno di toro rosso peppers. These peppers are my 2008 garden extraordinary phenomenon - i planted three seeds and five have grown...if only money worked in that way!!

Trials and Tribulations

My brother's initiation of a website/blog of a family seed trial reminded me that I have been slack at writing horticulture-related blogs and instead focusing predominantly on weddings. In reality the garden holds a lot more interest and is something I share with the beloved so it really should hold just as much importance!

So the family B is holding a seed trial akin to those of BBC Gardeners World; it seemed a good idea at the time although I suspect it will descend into anarchy, arguments and skullduggery....or perhaps just a little competitiveness at the very least!

I can't remember for the life of me who is Mr or Miss or Mrs A, B, C or D but all I know is that my beans are doing brilliantly - both varieties! The first lot were a climbing french bean donated by the brother in the family and were called something like 'flumouxed' or 'flaccid' or something beginning with F...possibly. They were black and looked like...well a bean. They popped up from the soil within four days of being planted and have happily shot for the skies (utility room window) ever since. The other, much better (obviously as they were my donation to the trial) variety are called 'Bert's Beans' as they originated from a plant stall somewhere in Berkshire with no label. They should eventually be climbing, long, flat green french beans and were both scrumptious and productive last year. Anyway they are growing fabulously and like the others they are stretching for light and desparately awaiting the final pane of glass being added to the new greenhouse.

The new greenhouse is an interesting event; its been three days now and we're still only half way up with the glass but the intention is to finish it tonight and celebrate with a nice cup of tea.

Back in the Wedding Swing of Things? Not Quite!

Still got the florist to decide on...what fun! Will get mum involved and make a decision this weekend.

Talking of this weekend, lots of fun things await as we get ready for our menu tasting (YUM big style) and visit to see our vicar, Chris Brown. Already feeling all sorts of Catholic guilt about getting hitched in a CofE church but I don't suppose that ever goes away whatever one does in life - always blame things on the Catholic guilt complex!

Got lots to talk to him about:
Can we have the campanologists (posh word for bell ringers) and can we have them for free or a token fee as surely they must do ring bells for the love of it and not the huge earning potential?

Should have put this one at the top - how much does he charge to officiate at our wedding? Seems wrong in my mind that we should pay for his services but I think in reality we're paying for the administrative process i.e. signing the registar and making it legal as opposed to Chris Brown at x pounds an hour, additional hours charged as double time!!

Is he happy for us to have not particularly gaudy flowers at Advent?

Is he happy for us to include a non-religious reading from my niece? Winnie the Pooh to be precise...well at the moment although plans seem to change constantly with weddings.

Is he happy for us to have a remembrance candle for both Dads?

Again something that should have really come before flowers and music, what actually happens during the service??? How long is it - very essential for planning my time schedule for the day.

SO many things to ask we'll be glad to get to the venue and start eating!!!

Wedding Apathy

So I have two florists offering their services for the big day and I really haven't been bothered to getting round and sorting it. I have definitely reached wedding apathy - really right now, I don't care a jot about the big day itself and would really quite like it to be here. I'm not saying I don't enjoy thinking about it but planning it really is the most tedious thing I could possibly think to do with my spare time so much so that I can't be arsed to send the 'save the dates' and organise a florist. I'm determined to get more motivated this weekend and get those envelopes into the post box; now that Stan has agreed the basic guest list they can be posted and done with....oh the hassle!

I wonder if every bride goes through this stage? I suppose it doesn't help when you work as an Events Manager - kind of like being on a busman's holiday!!! I just can't get excited about colour schemes and flowers and what napkins to have and what favours to give out, blah, blah, blah. I really did go through a super excited phase when it had all just happened and there were magazines to look through, websites to waste my life browsing on, forums on which you could get fab ideas but more importantly see how not to do it, and so on. I can't believe that at one point I was quite happy paying £5 for a magazine which consisted almost solely of advertisements for wedding dresses, a few 'real life' i.e. got stacks of money weddings and other such tat. Basically we want it to be a fun, relaxed, informal, slightly traditional, meaningful celebration. We don't want to be obsessing about everything on the day and we certainly don't want it to be an uptight, military-like, formal chore.

I'm sure that I will get back into things and really I only have the following to sort:

Florist
Honeymoon
Transport
Bridesmaid Dresses
Menu & Drinkies
Favours - if we have them
Music
Invites
My Wedding Ring
Accommodation
Sunday Lunch the Next Day
Readings, Etc

Probably a few more things but its not much really is it?

So the plan for April is:

Send 'save the date' cards
Speak to vicar about various church-related items
Menu tasting - YUM
Decide on Florist
Confirm timings with String Quartet and pay deposit
Organise wedding insurance
Confirm that I can have three weeks leave from work
Me to start paying off some of Stan's wedding ring

Easy as Pie!

My Biggest Worry!

Now some brides may say they are worried most about the big moment of saying "I do" or more minor things such as making sure their guests are happy or that the food is nice but not for me these mere insignificant concerns. My biggest worry about the day itself is that no-one will dance...not one single person...not even a single shuffler around a hand bag or a drunken 'frog in a blender' attempt at dancing - no-one!!! With dancing, I generally have visions of school discos where the girls sat around the edge and the boys just gathered having 'a laugh' because after all dancing is for wimps! Stan wanted acoustic at first mainly as a result of listening to a very good band recommended by the venue but I thought too dull and definitely not dancing material. I fancied a live band with a bit of oompha and who could play anything from 'Build me up Buttercup' to 'Wonderwall' and more but that was looking like £1500 minimum - ouch! In the end we went for an English Ceilidh. I emphasise the 'English' as ceilidhs all tend to lumped into the Scottish culture and you end up getting 'oh so you must have Scottish roots' when you mention it to people. An English ceilidh is 'a more riotous and eclectic variation on English Folk, Barn or Country dancing' according to www.webfeet.org and does indeed have roots in Scottish dancing but all the same it is quite different!

I found our ceilidh band using an tried and tested method of finding anything in general - the well used and ubiquitous Googling. The first band looked half decent so I followed them to their website and they looked good, sounded good and seemed to have a great sense of humour which matched my own. Once half the band had arrived home from their annual ski trip, all was confirmed although we have bagsied (remember the word 'bagsy'?) that date we're still going to see them first hand in May...good chance for a dance and a laugh, which is ultimately what we want our wedding to be.

Photographer Frenzy

Dress done! Venue done! Next biggie...photographer.

Spent ages looking for a good one as it was such a key element - in my opinion photos are the lasting memories of your day because however good your grey cells are at remembering things, you are ultimately going to forget the best bits. When we're old and grey I still want to be able to sit down with my husband, look through our photos and go "Oh yes, remember that".

The prices were frankly astonishing and I do think that wedding photography is a hugely lucrative industry which can be abused at the mercy of brides but I also think that photography is an art and we pay a fortune for wonderful drawings/paintings/sculptures, etc, so why shouldn't we pay for wonderful photos. I also think that as photos are such key reminders of the day itself, it is a lot of pressure for someone to be under to come through with the goods so the happy couple should expect to pay for that pressure.

Anyway, we were happy (!) to pay a reasonable amount although not as much as some and not as less as others (predominantly because I couldn't find a reasonably priced photographer whose work I fell for). There were two things I felt were important in the selection: firstly the portfolio really had to stand out and ideally if I could see an entire album then that had to be consistently, good quality and secondly I needed to click with the photographer. If that person is going to be lurking around all day including taking snaps of me getting ready in my undies I want them to be someone I can be frank with, have a laugh with and generally feel as though they are part of the guest list.

I ended up with a very small selection from which I met two photographers. Both ticked the 'click with' criterium but one stood out as being passionate about their 'art' and that is what won them the business. I won't rave about them too much as I haven't seen the finished article but after the wedding I will be happy to rave/moan etc with names!!!

Job done!

Princesses & Tiaras Conveyor Belt Style

When I originally spoke to Jan at Cinders she was keen to point out that she didn't run a 'conveyor belt' style of bridal shop and I didn't really know what she meant until I went to Confetti Bridal Centre in Wokingham. I suppose the word 'centre' should have given it away really!!

Anyway so there we were all again, this time my niece armed with fruit pastilles and ready to go. I had to do the same thing again but this time I had to do it whilst avoiding the fifteen other brides there that day plus their visitors. Eek. I had my own changing room into which my dresses were magically placed and then we were raring to go...when we got a chance given that everyone is straining to use the mirrors. First one I tried was lovely and simple and mum adored it but a little too simple for me...knowing what I'm like, I need something with a bit more ooompha so it got discarded. I tried on a few more and then tried on one very similar to the 'wow' dress from Cinders and it was very wow here too; I must admit that I looked amazing and my waist was tiny!! So that got put into number one place. I tried a very similar one on, in fact the 'actual wow' one from Cinders and....it made my hips look huge so it got canned! I did try on the 'wow but quirky' one too that I had tried before and it was....okay so it got canned. Finally I tried on what was a late entry in the final three from previously and it actually became the 'wow I feel like a princess' one. So there were two from which to choose and the pressure was on...I think deep down I wanted something that made me feel like I was getting married as opposed to something that I felt sexy in so I made the choice. BAM!

Deposit down, out of the shop....doubts creep in and I spent the whole weekend like that. obsessively surfing the net for pictures to remind me. Painstakingly trying to recreate what i had tried on to try and remember why I chose it over the sexy number and by 8.59am on Monday I had rung the shop and shouted "STOP". The dress got put on hold until I could speak to my sister in law to see if she could come and help with a fresh opinion - a) I couldn't and wouldn't put my sister, mum and niece through that again and b) a fresh pair of eyes is exactly what I needed to make my decision. Off we trundled on Tuesday and I had the whole shop almost to myself - heaven!! I tried it on and....Jane had a tear in her eye! Excellent, just the response I needed and I must admit that I fell in love with myself. I got a wonderful feeling in my tummy and I just wanted to wear it all day. There were some grannies there waiting for their granddaughter and they told me I looked fabulous....and they probably have seen a few brides in their time! So the dress got reordered and all is well with the world.

PS. Jan at Cinders was amazing but sometimes having something on your doorstep just makes all the difference; I would totally recommend her though for all Wiltshire brides.

Princesses and Tiaras

The dress buying was surprisingly quick; I had heard stories of visits to several dress shops and then back again and then back again once more! Yuech. I am not the world's greatest shopper as I prefer to nip in, get a visual check on whether or not there is anything I like in thet particular shop and then I either step further inside and grab certain pieces or make a dash for the door. Wedding dress shopping seems to be a whole new scenario!

The first shop I went to with my mum, sister and niece was Cinders in Devizes, which was very traditionally run by Jan. We entered into what could only be described as an Aladdins Cave of pretty dresses and were promptly passed a pair of white gloves each. Wow! Jan prefered shoppers not to handle the dresses with their sticky paws and I actually do agree as I imagine they would get grubby fairly fast. She had a definite plan : I had to go round the room and pull out any dresses that caught my eye and then we would go from there. So I mooched around, pulled out what didn't seem like very many and then surveyed my selection. A definite theme of colours and ruching and the unusual. Oh well, this may be interesting. I spent three hours with Jan and my family trying on dresses and quite quickly you get used to the "Yucks", the "Ahhs", the "Hmmm not suressss", "Wowss"...you get my gist. I never thought I would get through them all and find something I liked but I did - three ones I liked actually. Not telling you any more than that though...never know if the beloved could be reading this!

The Planning Slog

I've refered to planning a wedding as a 'slog' because it is, in fact I would liken wedding planning to DIY: necessary to create something lovely to last for a long time but takes over your life including any free time you may have both at home and at work. It even sneaks into the Land of Z - dreaming of weddings has been a bugbear of mine this year. How can I possibly be expected to concentrate at work when I have venues and florists and photographers and bands and colour schemes (more on those later) and wedding rings and dresses all floating around in my head. I have been abducted by the wedding aliens during the last few months and only now have they released me!



I completely admit that getting engaged meant I could buy lots of lovely wedding magazines (I do have penchant for magazines of any sort really). However, I quickly realised that I was being charged between £3 and £5 for magazines that contained an obscene amount of dress advertising and very little else of any substance. These magazines do encourage the competitive and envious streak in a bride - 'real life' weddings all seem to be so perfect but they also seem to be hovering around the average cost of a wedding mark i.e. £20,000.



So the first and most important thing to get sorted was a venue; where we currently live doesn't hold any personal connection but similarly neither of us have parents living where we originally grew up. Initially we looked at the Lake District, Scotland and Northumberland but quickly decided that viewing venues could be time-consuming, which is something we want to avoid - the wedding taking over our life! Stan's ideal wedding would be just us two abroad but there was no way I was going to get married without my family there so that option rapidly got binned. We did look at that new buzzword 'a destination wedding' but I wasn't sure that everyone we wanted there could afford it so we ditched that as well. Mum eventually suggested her local CofE church (we're catholic), which escalated into looking at venues nearby and the local catholic church. I also had a look at venues close to home but couldn't really find anything that ticked all the boxes so we went with my first option but getting wed in a catholic church didn't feel right. We were about to plump for a civil ceremony when Mum had a word with the local vicar who would quite happily wed two catholics in his CofE church. Hoorah. It is on Mum's doorstep and we walk the dog around it when we're there and we just love it - fantastic, venue booked!



Second biggie was a photographer. This was something that really meant a lot to me as I am keen on photography and I am keen to have a certain look. I spent ages and ages and ages looking at photographers ranging in cost from £550 to £5500 (!); days were spent looking at online portfolios and albums until I was about to go mad with photo overload. I met with two in the end - both ladies - and liked them both. Jo Hansford won in the end as our personalities clicked, I liked her use of cross-processing with film and I just thought she had a lovely outlook on life. I can't wait for her to photograph our wedding.



So two biggies sorted - venue and photographer. Next - florists. So far have only met with one - a local lady who lives near Mum but she seems to be very nice and very accommodating. I'm also meeting this weekend with the florist who is local to the venue so will be updating you on who I choose as soon as I decide.



Finally, and quite frankly the most fun, dresses....

Getting engaged and getting the sparkler

So I meant to blog when I first got engaged but getting engaged seemed to take over and then wedding planning came along! For the first two months of this year I have been in a maelstrom of weddings and wedding planning and wedding suppliers, in fact anything with the prefix of wedding!

Being asked to marry Stan was the most amazing but surreal experience ever! He asked me as part of a conversation - just dropped it in - in the Hotel Altepost in St Anton (oh dear, we'll HAVE to go back there now just to reminise - how difficult will that be). It was inevitable that he would have done it but it could have taken a while although he did say he was thinking of doing it in Finland. Looking back at the holiday in Finland I'm not sure he would have done - just not one of those sort of holidays i.e. too many people around. Anyway, I digress (something I'm likely to do on many of my blogs). Stan had also been amazing and told me that he had bought me a wedding present in advance - the Perfect Story - a beautiful sculpture by Lorenzo Quinn of a book hollowed out and a embracing naked couple inside. Just gorgeous! I proceeded to inform everyone in the hotel that I was getting married (little bit tipsy at this point) and then we had some champagne. Bad idea! Consequently I have completely and utterly decided that a) drinking champers at altitude is a real 'no no' and b) I don't really like the taste of the bubbly stuff anyway so what the hell was I thinking of?? I felt dreadfully ill the next day and having to wake up and pack to leave on a coach at 7am was so unpleasant that the day after was one of hangovers, feeling dazed and experiencing dumbfoundedness. Neither of us were particularly 'over the moon' as one would expect a newly engaged couple to be....come Monday though, we were soaring for the stars! Monday, or Christmas Eve, was wonderful; I was so excited that it was Christmas and I had my mum, sister and niece to stay and that I was ENGAGED. No longer to be left on the shelf - hoorah!

We got my engagement ring that day; Stan popped into town to get last minute presents (how did I not see through that one??) and texted me to say that he was in the pub recovering after putting the deposit down on a ring. He suggested that I pop in after Christmas to look at it - yeah right!?!!?!? I motored into town and dragged him back to the shop; he had paid for the one we had originally seen a while back and loved but I insisted on trying on the entire selection before plumping for the original gorgeous sparkler. The words 'typical female' were uttered more than once by my beloved!!